Passing on lessons

Author passes along family heritage through lessons
Date	February 06, 2013
Section(s)	Generations
Byline	By LINDSEY ADKISON The Brunswick News
Gayle Bowman has always worked to instill a sense of history in her children, but it hasn't always been easy. As an African-American, there are many pieces of her family's collective past that aren't pretty. Even so, it was important for her to share all of these stories with her daughters -- Sterling Bowman-Randall, 22, and Carmen Bowman-Randall, 18. It was a practice she started when the girls were very young. "Carmen once asked me why she and I were white and Sterling and Daddy were black. I told her that we were all black, and that God makes people in all shades of colors," she said. "It was at that time that I told them about our family's -- their paternal grandfather's side mixed heritage, and also about slavery and the civil rights struggle. I guess they were about 6 and 10 when we had our first serious discussion of any significance." As they got older, Bowman continued to discuss more age-appropriate topics dealing with history -- especially black history. "Sterling even met Rosa Parks when she was a baby," she said. Starting the conversation when the children were young was crucial, but, at the same time, she didn't want to frighten or upset her children. That's why Bowman, who is also a children's author with a book about African-American inventors, was very selective about what she told her girls and when. Above all, though, she was always honest with her girls. "It's important that they understand what happened during slavery and the Civil Rights particularly on those whose shoulders we all stand, those who made sometimes life-threatening sacrifices for the sake of freedom, peace, basic human rights and equality," she said. To teach them these stories, Bowman started a basic black history course in her own home. That included books and movies -- though she says that she always encouraged reading more than watching television. And she made sure the messages was getting through. "If I felt my children weren't paying attention to a book or historical movie I made them watch, they would have to write a paragraph about what they learned. It's hard to push reading in middle or high school. That influence needs to come early," she said. It is also displaying photographs, some of which were disturbing. "I purchased two signs with my daughters in mind: A light switch plate that says, 'If you think you have it tough, think about the work Harriet Tubman had to do,' and an authentic Jim Crow era sign that reads, 'Colored Served By Carry Out Only,'" she said. "There are also pictures of slaves, a whip and a trough that the slave children ate from like pigs on the floor. I have also told them stories my parents told me about segregation in the South." The family has traced their history back even farther. Bowman's great-uncle has gone as far as the last generation in slavery and she's making sure that her children will keep their heritage alive. "I'm helping him fill in the gaps. My sister traced my father's side back to the 1700s. It's important for children and adults to learn their family history as well as that of other notables in their own races. This type of research fosters an appreciation of lineage and provides information to pass on to the future generations," she said. "One of my sisters and I have kept, and have passed on our father's last name to our children in order to keep the Bowman name alive," she said. "My generation -- and there are no males with Bowman as a last name -- is the last of the Bowmans. I believe that if children have something to be proud of, perhaps something or someone positive to align themselves with, they will be in a better position to have a higher level of self-esteem and a desire to set challenging goals for themselves." This is why Bowman hopes other African-American families will take the time to teach their children about the past. But they are not alone. It's important, she says, for everyone to appreciate the struggles and accomplishments of one's fellow man. "It's important that parents teach their children about all races and cultures in addition to their own. Doing so, I believe, minimizes the belief and perpetuation of negative stereotypes and racists thoughts/remarks. It's important to share our history, not just for black children's sake, but for all children," she said. * Lifestyle Editor Lindsey Adkison writes about lifestyle topics. Contact her at ladkison@thebrunswicknews.com, on Facebook or at 265-8320, ext. 316.